If there is one thing I know I'm good at, that is living in denial. We go back years. I guess it is a coping mechanism, not sure.
Anyway this Tuesday is my surgery and oh boy, am I looking forward to that. I am scared shitless. I have issues with hospitals, it goes back to the days of Pete being in the hospital for a month and went through 17 hours of surgery, when he broke his back. I was traumatized. Although I have conquered that fear somewhat this year, by being tough getting my blood taken, and having my bro there to hold my hand :) and having to see see Doctors for my knee etc. has helped. I also went with my mom both times for her Cataract surgery, and I didn't faint or vomit, so I am getting better.
I am trying to use some of my methods I use for when I run Agility at a big event. Trying not to think too much about that actual day, and just getting my mind in the right state, right now. I am listening to music that is motivational and uplifting - for me that really helps. Music has always been there for me.
I am hoping my hard work with Gyp's rehab and mine will pay off and one day, we'll be able to run together again, I miss running her more than is probably normal. Gyp had her last treatment 2 weeks ago and got the go ahead to do more. I've upped Gyp's exercises and her muscles are holding really well, no spasms, no tightness. We do ball work every other day, Cavallettis at 4" on the opposite days and jogging everyday, with 10 minutes of stretching over the day. It is a big commitment, but it is paying off.
I'm feeling strong going in to my surgery, busting my ass in workouts is a good way to get out frustration, and having my knee hurt is an honest reminder of why I am doing this.
I am not sure what we will be doing in 2 or 3 months form now, hell even 6 months from now. I am coming to the realization that 2011 is the year of rehab, and well I am not thrilled about that, we'll make the best of it.
On another note, Jane is doing well these days. We are going on a date to the Pet Store today and for a little granny walk at the Park, now that it has warmed up.
Hopefully this will be us again one day ...
This song is often played to remind me of what I am working for and why I am doing it.